[Soldier: 76 had been told about the wall, but he never bothered himself with going around there. As far as he was concerned, it wouldn't affect him much, if at all. So the fact that Gabe's kitchen was so cold and feeling oppressive, he didn't immediately consider the wall as the source.
This news hit like a wave. It crashed across his consciousness, and he stared dumbfounded at Reyes. His expression was mix of disbelief and shock. He had only just arrived, only just started talking to her. How could she be... gone?]
...you're certain?
[He stood frozen in the doorway. He had dealt with a lot of loss some years ago, but otherwise, he kept himself relatively alone. He carried around enough ghosts on his shoulders.]
Yes- I looked around her usual places to see if her amulet was still here, and after a few days I went to the wall of names.
[He very rarely went there, only when he noticed someone was gone and there was no sign of a lonesome amulet or a crystal statue of them somewhere. The final confirmation was always the wall, and he had no doubt the list of new names that had appeared there was pinned on a board.
Finally, he pulled himself from the counter to face Jack and take just a few steps closer. At something of a loss, because she was back where she needed to be, but...]
[76 knew that Reyes wouldn't have called him here if he hadn't been certain of the outcome, but he had needed the confirmation all the same. While they weren't always on the same page, with news like this, he knew he could believe Gabriel to be frank and honest. After all, the older man was suffering a seemingly greater loss than he.
Reyes and Ana had been here about the same amount of time. They had likely mended fences with each other, had probably re-established a friendship together. First his other self and now Ana. The trio ripped apart again.
He rolled his shoulders and clenched his hands, so easily able to fall into anger about it. That was the emotion that sprang up first, but it had no place here. Reyes had lost Ana; he had barely managed to get her back.] I'm sorry for your loss. [It was grunted out, not as smooth as he had once done when notifying families of their losses.] Is there anything I can do to help?
[Eyes narrowed at first, that chill in the air knocking off- but the heat only lasted for a few seconds before the cold overtook again. Far easier to feel with how close Gabriel had gotten to the man, slight and brief as the change had been; like that because of his control over it.
There was a breath.] Don't act as if this isn't your loss, too. No matter how briefly she may have seemed to be here for you.
[He couldn't even muster anger, voice still too soft. Some wound that couldn't be seen there over it all. Had patched things up, managed to mend what was there. Nearly three years and he was now the only one who remembered it all here.]
Will you stay? [A slight break in his voice, but he either didn't notice or ignored it.]
[Soldier: 76 was keenly aware of the change in temperature, always had been aware of it even if it normally didn't affect him. He suspected the reason for the temperature variation. He glanced aside at the comment, drawing a breath and holding it for a few moments.]
I didn't have her as long as you did. [That's easy to point out, but not the reason they were having this conversation.] I lost Ana a long time ago. It was such a welcome to have her back even briefly, to know she survived.
[He made no effort elevate his voice from its usual tired gruffness. They weren't arguing. There was no need for that.
At the request, he glanced aside and chewed on his lower lip. It was the break in tone that had the biggest impact on him, and he slowly nodded his head. He generally grieved alone; he knew that Gabriel likely did too.]
Yeah, I'll stay. What are you planning on doing tonight?
We both lost her a long time ago- and you are going to get her back while I'm not. [Back home he meant, of course. Of course he knew, had connections to know they were traveling together after the encounter in Egypt- but also an admittance that here was the only place he'd have that friendship back.
Everything done here was fragile, easily broken by a simple disappearance, a return home.]
You'll have her back.
[No arguing at all, for all he cared they were cold hard facts of things. Wasn't wrong in the thought he usually grieved alone, already had been for so many other things and this- this was the last straw in a few months.
Tired of being alone.]
I've already cleared out her home, of what couldn't be left there. [Perishables, the animals. He'd done all the important things that day. Some days before.]
I forget, did I ever give you a taste of that liquor here that cuts through all of the SEP bullshit?
[Soldier: 76 hadn't known that, hadn't lived that part yet. The idea that hunting Shrike down had resulted in a travel companion again was novel after so many years living and fighting alone. His expression was half suspicious and half relieved, even if he would never know it as long as he was here.]
I didn't know that. I wasn't certain what to expect when I went looking for Shrike in Cairo.
[He shrugged though because that was there and not here. All he knew was that he would be making a go for Gabriel as well now that he knew the man was alive after nothing more than crazy theories and rumours.
He looked around as if he could tell which items were Ana's and which were Gabe's. He hadn't been in the house long enough to actually be able to do that, but Ana had always had a certain taste to her things.]
Should have called me earlier. I could have helped clear her place out with you. [That wasn't something someone grieving should have to face alone.
He tilted his head slightly at the idea of a liquor that overtook their massive metabolism as SEP survivors. He'd given up drinking because there was no point doing it for the taste these days.]
...no, I don't remember you saying anything about that. [A beat.] So... we're drinking tonight? You sure that's not dangerous?
[A shrug of his shoulder-] I don't know details, just that you're traveling together.
[He'd had other things to take care of, knows of the drastic change when it came to the council, but otherwise he was left in some odd sort of limbo of what was going to happen next.
There were more teacups in the cabinet- but other than that he hadn't quite finished. He'd only mostly cleared out food and the like. Made sure he'd collected all of the animals' things as well.]
Not finished with it yet. Still... it still has things from 'the other you' as you put it there, too. [So of course he hadn't called, and it was all still there for him to sort through, just included Ana's things now, too.
Gabriel just moved towards the fridge, some clear glass bottles with neon purple, blue, and green liquids inside of them definitely a new addition. Enough to split or knock himself out alone that much faster, pulling a neon purple one out.]
It's not dangerous, no. figured either haul off down to the basement or living room. Enough food in the fridge to help combat any hangover.
I wasn't certain I would have been able to convince her. [It was said quietly.
And the tendril of hope for that was bittersweet now that she was gone, now that he had lost the opportunity to talk with her, to actually do more than look around her place and be twitchy indoors. With Ana gone, she would be back to wherever she had come from.
It really meant that he and Gabriel were rather alone, wasn't it? Sure, there was McCree, but that young man had always been Reyes' pet project. Ana had truly been closest to the two of them, and it seemed like the opportunity to have a touch of that was now lost. He sighed heavily and leaned against the door frame tucking his visor in his pocket carefully.]
We should clean out her place then tomorrow. [He didn't really have anything to say about other him or the potential items. If they were nice, maybe he'd bother himself enough to take them. It wasn't like he owned anything but what he carried on him.
He noted the vibrant colours of the drinks, and he raised an eyebrow at them. Nothing that colour ever did anyone any favours he figured. All the same, he had been asked to stay and maybe a part of him would enjoy being numb from alcohol. Been a long time.]
That's not what I meant. [He slowly entered the kitchen to peer around and then found a part of the counter to lean on.] You and I have never been drunk together, and after our little... pollination adventure, you think we should?
Probably less convincing her, and more convincing you- can't miss how she jumped in like the old days for you. [He didn't doubt there was some long talks, and that Ana's mission was different from the one Jack had pointed himself on. Just had to compromise, and likely was more on 76 and Shrike.
Something had mended over the years in this place, because hell if Gabriel hadn't fully understood why Ana had done what she'd done. It was more having to understand what he'd done, why he was doing what he was doing.
That there was only revenge left for him, and he would have it. He'd put an end to Overwatch's sad story, never to let it be repeated again. Kept himself where he needed to be in order to do it.]
... Yeah. I basically got her animals and food. Tea. Things like that. [There were a lot of wood working tolls and other items that belonged to Morrison there. Hammock. Few other things like that. Things easy to carry and transport if he ever had to pick up and run to some safehouse or out in the woods.
Gabriel kept that unlabeled bottle in hand.]
I think it doesn't matter. I don't go that way when drunk, especially not if I'm going to get extremely drunk real fast. [What he was planning on doing, too. This wasn't to enjoy anything. This as to numb everything.] I just don't want to be alone right now, Jack.
I'm tired of it, tired of a lot right now.
[There was McCree up in one of the attic rooms, yes, but... This was a different sort of alone. Close as the cowboy was, it wasn't what Ana was. Or even what Jack himself had been.
Besides, the gunslinger was still picking himself up.]
Age made more far more reckless... after all, very few normal people can take me in a fight, so my wading in usually sends them running. [He had taken out more of Hakem's men than normal people would be able to, but his anger had blinded him to the dangers of going toe-to-toe with Reaper. Yes, Ana's assistance had been needed.] I doubt she wanted to have either of us kill each other. She knew we were angry and stubborn enough to do it.
[It was that part which bothered him more than he would have expected it to. Gabriel wasn't the Reaper that he had heard rumours and reports about, and that was a big change. To lose Ana was to lose the possibility of having someone that had watched that change happen over the years. Also, who else had even been here as long as Reyes anymore?
He grunted at the mention of tea.] Always with her tea. She never had whiskey or anything fun. Swear she would pack my wounds with tea leaves one of these days. [He shook his head.] Never could sew flesh together either. Always left that for you.
[Yeah well, he supposed that was true, but there was a frown on his lips when Gabe made it clear this was going to be a night where black-out drunk was the objective of the evening and Reyes planned on getting to that finish line as fast as possible. It was only the request to stay from before that had him holding his tongue. Gabe was an adult and could do whatever the hell he wanted.]
You're tired of being alone? [Not sure he exactly expected to hear that so soon, even if he saw it, saw the signs.] I said I would stay, and I will, Gabriel. I can still be a man of my word.
[He slowly eased over to the fridge and opened it to pull out one of the neon blue bottles and swirled the liquid. He popped the cap off with a thumb and turned back to regard the older man.]
You're a sad sack of crap, you know that. Come one, let's find a place for you to drink yourself to oblivion and I'll try not to draw on your face when you're out.
[Reaper had only been there to get some information for Sombra, and expected for Shrike to show up because it was Hakim. Knew damn well what the man was up to there, and just who had been a thorn in his side for quite a while.
Solider: 76 turning up had been something that meant he'd have to step in rather than be in and out. Why not take the opportunity to prove that he had been looking for the man since Switzerland? Knew that he'd survived, but never acted despite the fact it was expected of him to take the both of them out.
At least he knew someone who'd been here for five years.] Need something in you other than whiskey, probably good for you- on her end? You were back at her hideout in Cairo. She's going back to you.
[Give him that much to hold on to at least.
This wasn't some time to drink and enjoy it, there was nothing to enjoy. Just drink and feel nothing for at least a little while before picking himself right back up. Some moment of weakness.]
I'm the one that always ends up that way in the end. [Why the hell not allow for feeling sorry for himself? After holding it together for the last few months, just... letting go for a night.
Snorting but, well. He wasn't going to argue, grabbing a few more bottles from that fridge before heading for the sitting room. Den. Whatever, he was going to just sit on the couch.]
Talking like I need to let you get drunker before I do.
[That fight had been the moment just before he came here, and he had thankfully cooled his head since then. Maybe he should have been more angry with Reyes, refused to interact and hunted the man down to make his life hell, but... why? He had enough on his plate without throwing on hating a guy he had suspected had also survived the blast. It seemed more like an inevitability that they would meet again if it were true.
He shrugged his shoulders, thinking he would still have been happier with whiskey. That bullet had done an excellent job trying to fester after all.] Probably, but it wasn't what I wanted after a fight with you. [He grunted as if her coming back to him meant some slight to Reyes. He doubted it was true.] Well, she sure as hell isn't joining Talon, so her hands were tied, weren't they? You weren't passing out invitations.
[It was nice to know they would have each other. Right now it seemed empty with how recently Ana had left. Maybe in time he'd unravel his complex feelings about that.
Jack looked at Gabriel and nodded his head, supposing that was true on some level.] I'm giving you twenty-four hours to feel sorry for yourself, so get it all out, alright? After that, I'm kicking your ass. [Because he and Reyes were about finding solutions, not griping about wallowing in problems. Still, everyone needed time to grieve.
And he could be the strong one. It hurt that Ana was gone, but he had less invested in this place, so he could just bury his feelings on that matter. Reyes needed it more now than ever, so he would actually do what he could to accommodate.
Instead, he followed Reyes to the sitting room, finding a part of the couch to settle himself into after a quick sweep with his eyes to make certain all was secure. The dogs would let them know if there were intruders in the area.]
Fat chance of that. You're the one hurrying to numb unconsciousness. I'm here to hold your hair when you puke in the toilet bowl.
I'm not the one that passes out invitations anyway. [He was pick-up or take-out, nothing in between as far as he was concerned. Didn't mean some slight, no, more of a fact that he knew she would. All the better to make himself an enemy, no matter if Morrison continued to hunt him down after that or not.
His concerns and attentions were elsewhere, stakes raised.
Made a low noise in his throat, more neutral than anything else he'd made lately.] Reasonable enough. Get it all out tonight. [Because he had to figure out a few things after.
Time management and just what the fuck was to be done with that base. Sitting back on that couch, already knowing all of the cats were going elsewhere if they hadn't already. Upstairs in to one of the second floor bedrooms, probably.
Lifted that bottle, top flicked off with his thumb—]
Just enjoy a damn bottle, and don't try and chug it. Shit will knock you off your feet.
[—Taking a good swig of that neon purple, sinking in to something of a slouch all the same.]
I know you're not part of the recruitment branch and a good thing too... you always take on the works-in-progress anyway. [He knew from all the stories and rumours that Reyes' skill set was very much employed in Talon operations. He had seen the footage of troop movements, and it was glaringly obvious how much Blackwatch tactics were there. More than that, Reyes was able to get into places others couldn't but with maximum damage on the way out.
They sometimes had done that, given one another time limits to bitch, moan, rage and rant. After the time limit came around, it was back to business and harsh realities where problems needed solution. Grief was always difficult to slot into limits, but Reyes' exhaustion for being alone was something he could. Let it all out.]
You're free to say and do whatever you want about it, and I'll be here listening. [And engaging. He didn't mind little scuffles that came with the need for a physical outlet as well, though honestly, alcohol tended to not be involved because they previously couldn't get drunk.
This would be an interesting test of old tactics.
He swirled the liquid in the bottle that he had, examining it.] I haven't been drunk since my twentieth birthday. [SEP had fixed that. He watched Reyes take a sip first then sipped from his own bottle. And then twitched. Shit that stuff was strong! He scrutinized the bottle again more closely.] What the hell is this stuff?
Not interested. [With Talon's works-in-progress anyone. It was a means to an end and nothing more. Did what he needed to keep in their favor, stakes raised with how high he climbed, allowed him just enough freedom to work as he needed. Didn't train any of them either- well, he had trained the ones that came from Blackwatch.
Wasn't surprised when he saw so many familiar faces there, those from Overwatch as well.
It was better to have the time to work it out, get everything they could out all at once in anyway that was best. Hell, after they'd lost Ana before everything fell they'd both taken the time they could manage to mourn. Mourn before claws dug in to try and take everything apart, before they'd both had to focus and... pull apart.]
All you're going to hear is me feeling damn sorry for myself, Jack. [Something he'd kept buried for months, buried as deep as he could, but now there just... weren't so many projects to bury himself in. This one hit hard, one right after the other and it just.
He wanted to be numb, at least for a little while, before picking right back up. So he sunk in that couch and just drank slowly. Letting it be felt rather than downing the bottle quick.] Well, happy birthday again. This shit will do it.
Emotional bullshit liquor making, it's called a Gargleblaster and it's delicious.
[He shrugged his shoulders, letting the topic of conversation go without a fight. There was no real point discussing it, was there? They wouldn't remember it when they went back, assuming they all would. Gabriel's motivations were his own and like always, the older man seemed to take the path with the most danger but also the biggest payoffs. That's how Gabriel won the First Omnic Crisis.
It was interesting how the first time Ana had died, he had spent years blaming himself. He thought that he would revert back to that in finding out that she had gone back this time, but honestly, he mostly just felt numb. He couldn't tell what that actually said about him, but he supposed that his hair couldn't go any more white these days, so no point sitting on the grief.
Mourning was something he didn't do much anymore. He liked to think he didn't care enough to, but that was wrong. Maybe he just hadn't stopped in the last six years.]
That's fair. You've suffered your share of losses over the years. Now what? You live the dangerous game of whatever you're doing in Talon. For the last few years, you've been stuck in a place that you'll never remember when you go back, so what's the actual point of investing, right? [He had no doubt that Gabriel could flesh out the assessment for hours on end. Maybe there would even be a story or two about the other him that had been here for years.
Best he could do was poke Reyes to open up the flood gates before the man hit the drawling barely conscious stage of waxing and waning depressive slurred poetry. It probably wouldn't even rhyme.]
No point. I stopped celebrating birthdays years ago. [No point celebrating when alone. He took another sip from his drink, holding it on his tongue a little longer than the first time.] Maybe if we get drunk enough, we can wake up thinking we're home.
[Of course it was emotional bullshit liquor. Why was he not surprised at all?]
Fruity drinks were never my favourite. [He wasn't about to refuse free booze that would knock his socks off.]
Already been asking myself that ever since people started wanting me for have hope for anything. [Spoken with a snort. Really, people had wanted for him to have hope for all sorts of things- Couldn't even remember when he started wanting to hope anymore. That didn't even matter, nothing here did when it would simply be gone and forgotten whenever he returned home for good.
Yet here he damn well was. Nearly three years and- well. Not the only one here, but now the only one here from their world that had been in this place for so long. Why him of all people? What was the point of it all?
Reduce him to this goddamn mess?
Nearly scoffed—] My 60th only got celebrated because Shimada remembered while he was here and pulled Kevin in to help. I don't even remember the last time anyone, let alone me, bothered to before that.
[Why celebrate when you were dead to the world at large? Better off that way.
The fact he downed nearly half the bottle at that was likely not a goo sign. Grimacing more at the sudden burn of it all going down than anything else.] Why bother thinking we're home? You're somewhere in Cairo and I'm off in Venice months after that run in.
It's just as damn pointless as anything here.
[No really, he went over the pointlessness of everything mentally of a regular enough basis it's a surprise he was keeping it together as long as he had.]
[Jack couldn't help but snort softly, shaking his head a bit.] We had hope that things would get better in the war. We sacrificed for peace, to make the world a better place... and then look what happened. [He had given up on actual hope a long time ago. Revenge and the mission was all their was. He needed something to do or he'd go mad.
He looked over at Gabriel hunkered on the other side of the couch nursing on that fruity neon drink of his. He considered for a moment.] Didn't think either Shimada would care much for birthdays. Seemed too formal or morose most times I ever laid eyes on them.
[Exactly. No point celebrating when dead. Also no point celebrating when there was no one to celebrate with. It was just another day.
So much for taking his own advice and not chugging it, Gabe. He shook his head, but he made no correction. Reyes was an adult. He wasn't his boss anymore.] Months after, huh? Guess I never caught up with you in that time.
And yet you've set down roots here. Now you're suffering new losses.
[He sipped his drink, taking the moderation approach but mostly because he didn't actually believe he would be able to get wasted. It was strong, but his metabolism had never actually failed before. As he said, someone had to hold Gabe's hair out of his face if vomiting started... or the guy was reduced to muck on the floor that he had to usher into a bottle.]
People were afraid of the power Overwatch held, or were jealous of it, and so took everything out. That's fucking what. [There was a pause- before a couple of shadow hands rose up out of Gabriel's shadow and did a second raiding of the fridge. Pulled out about four containers of what was obviously food, pre-made and likely all from the fact he couldn't cook a single helping to save his life.
Reyes could only manage full meals for multiple people, but at least it was good. The hands returned with the containers and some forks. Grabbing up one as for the moment after that large drink he was going to be eating some cold- it looked like some sot of cheesy chicken pasta.]
Genji's lightened up a lot, that monk I mentioned before. He's a good kid, always had been even with all that hurt and anger in him. [Could fucking relate now.] He wanted me to celebrate my 60th, and so he and Kevin pulled together a Halloween themed birthday party for me. Actually invited other people who knew me here, too.
First time in years people wanted to celebrate the fact I exist. [Well, it was starting, but at least this time when he took a swig from his own bottle there'd be food with it.]
I don't even know when I did, kept telling myself it was pointless- but people kept... wanting me to have something.
[Jack was going to be in for a surprise, because the fact it cut through Gabriel's own metabolism on top of the wraith bullshit- well. He'd been feeling it a lot sooner than he expected.]
They felt like they lost control of Overwatch, and that we were slowly encroaching in areas where big names were going to lose money. The rich don't like losing money or influence. [He knew how that game worked better than most, growing up as he had on a farm in Indiana where the little guy was a pawn in the political game. It had become more apparent when he was dealing in political circles.
He paused from taking another sip at the weird shadow hands, watching them move off with interesting control and then bringing back food. He shrugged his shoulders, aware that would only slow the process of getting absolutely wasted. Still, he hadn't seen food like that since the last time he had spied on a restaurant.]
Yeah, so you said. Still have trouble imagining it; he was such a quiet and damaged kid when you were picking him up. [He nodded his head, glad to here that Reyes had managed some semblance of connection to people who really seemed to care about him. It seemed like such a rare thing these days. for people like them.] Must have been quite the ride having people celebrate you. Good party too?
[76 thought it was pointless, but he could see the draw. He shrugged a little, not expecting the same.] Good to have something, even if you taught me having something just means it can be taken away.
[He was sipping it like it was just a casual drinking party, like he always had. It warmed his belly, but otherwise, he was okay for the time being.]
They sure as fuck don't, and boy has Talon killed for it whenever someone's gotten overly greedy. [Had carried out a few of those himself- Akande likely had as well, judging by what had happened in Venice.
Gabriel tapped the lid of a box-] There's enough for you, if you don't want to drink on an empty stomach. Do you better in the long run. [-before returning to his bottle. If he was going to even near the possibility of hanging over a toilet, he at least wanted more than stomach acid to come up after a while. Terrible as that thought was.
He was a 'responsible' drink-to-numb-the-pain-er? Something.]
Was a good party, yeah. They'd gotten Ana's help, too.
[Good memories of that day, but it's all they were. Even then they only would last so long as he was in this place. Pointless again.] Sometimes you've also got to decide if having it is worth that risk. Taught you that, too.
Sounds like a great place to spend your time. Least you're mucking out the stalls in that place for better or worse.
[He looked at the box of left-overs for a long moment and shrugged his shoulders. When was the last time he ate anything not cooked over a fire? Lately, not much. Before, only in hovels where only a cast-iron stomach likely allowed him to survive the experience without puking for the next thirty-six hours.
Slowly, he reached out to take the box that Gabriel indicated and a utensil and set both in his lap. His drink went between his knees as he opened the box to peer at the contents.] You made it seem like there wouldn't be a long run here. [He took a taste first, but who was he to complain about free food that fed directly into not only his metabolism but was probably some of the first emotional-enriched food he had eaten that wasn't made by him.] It's good. You made it?
[He nodded his head and picked through the food in front of him, putting some on his stomach so he doesn't just get too wasted and be useless to Reyes in this. He's supposed to be the less sad one, which... he actually isn't. Losing Ana was devastating, but he won't process it for a time.]
Something you'll remember, no doubt. Guess we only really have memories at this point.
[76 snorted softly, shaking his head. He hadn't had anything 'worthwhile' in years, and he'd tried to stop himself from caring about it for awhile now.] Look how well it got us too, hmm?
[As for the food? It looked like something with steak, sliced up and seared so very nicely. Even if cold it would still feel like it was warming the man up as he ate. There were vegetables in there as well. Some possibly roasted potatoes. Whatever it was it was delicious, give him that much.] I'm responsible, even if I plan on getting drunk enough to black out.
Better not done on an empty stomach. [Still, there was a nod to the question. He'd made it. His food was always comforting in the emotional side of things. Warmed someone up from the inside out in the most pleasant of ways.] Yeah, got in a lot of practice here.
[Hell, part of the reason he invited Jack over was to let him have the time. He didn't doubt it had been like a gut punch, but let him process it in his own time.]
And even then they're temporary for this place. Go right back like nothing ever happened.
[Yet here he was all the damn same. Taking another drink from the bottle with the neon purple mix-] I don't regret anything about what we did back then.
[It was homemade food and that put it leaps and bounds ahead of most of the stuff that he ate in the last six years. Even cold, he had no problem with it, and it was hardy and tasty, so he wouldn't deny enjoying it. Made him wonder when the last time he had cooked. Made him wonder if he even could anymore.] Fair enough. I'm not your boss. You do whatever you want.
[It had been awhile since he had regretted his life, but now didn't seem like it was worth a new try at it. If this alcohol was as good as Reyes indicated, he was going to need to be cautious. He was here because his presence was requested, not so he could just give into that gaping despair that they could so easily stand on the edge of.] At least you're taking up old hobbies, I guess.
[It wasn't like Reyes slept apparently. That was a lot of time to think of losses. No wonder Gabriel wanted to get black-out drunk and forget for a few hours. Blessed peace and quiet from the brain weasels.]
So does that mean you're supposed to enjoy it while you can, or just refuse to do anything because it doesn't matter anyway?
[He grunted and sipped from his bottle once he had finished chewing the food in his mouth. The fruitiness didn't exactly mix well with the savoury food, but he had no complaints about free stuff.]
No regrets, huh? That's a good thought, I guess. We did a lot back then. [A pause as he rubbed his thumb on the bottle absently.] Remember when we were arguing over that Prague strategy and Ana grabbed us both by the ears and dragged us around the whole room calling us stubborn idiots?
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2019-08-05 04:45 pm (UTC)This news hit like a wave. It crashed across his consciousness, and he stared dumbfounded at Reyes. His expression was mix of disbelief and shock. He had only just arrived, only just started talking to her. How could she be... gone?]
...you're certain?
[He stood frozen in the doorway. He had dealt with a lot of loss some years ago, but otherwise, he kept himself relatively alone. He carried around enough ghosts on his shoulders.]
no subject
Date: 2019-08-05 04:52 pm (UTC)[He very rarely went there, only when he noticed someone was gone and there was no sign of a lonesome amulet or a crystal statue of them somewhere. The final confirmation was always the wall, and he had no doubt the list of new names that had appeared there was pinned on a board.
Finally, he pulled himself from the counter to face Jack and take just a few steps closer. At something of a loss, because she was back where she needed to be, but...]
She's gone.
no subject
Date: 2019-08-05 05:06 pm (UTC)Reyes and Ana had been here about the same amount of time. They had likely mended fences with each other, had probably re-established a friendship together. First his other self and now Ana. The trio ripped apart again.
He rolled his shoulders and clenched his hands, so easily able to fall into anger about it. That was the emotion that sprang up first, but it had no place here. Reyes had lost Ana; he had barely managed to get her back.] I'm sorry for your loss. [It was grunted out, not as smooth as he had once done when notifying families of their losses.] Is there anything I can do to help?
no subject
Date: 2019-08-05 05:28 pm (UTC)There was a breath.] Don't act as if this isn't your loss, too. No matter how briefly she may have seemed to be here for you.
[He couldn't even muster anger, voice still too soft. Some wound that couldn't be seen there over it all. Had patched things up, managed to mend what was there. Nearly three years and he was now the only one who remembered it all here.]
Will you stay? [A slight break in his voice, but he either didn't notice or ignored it.]
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Date: 2019-08-06 12:26 am (UTC)I didn't have her as long as you did. [That's easy to point out, but not the reason they were having this conversation.] I lost Ana a long time ago. It was such a welcome to have her back even briefly, to know she survived.
[He made no effort elevate his voice from its usual tired gruffness. They weren't arguing. There was no need for that.
At the request, he glanced aside and chewed on his lower lip. It was the break in tone that had the biggest impact on him, and he slowly nodded his head. He generally grieved alone; he knew that Gabriel likely did too.]
Yeah, I'll stay. What are you planning on doing tonight?
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Date: 2019-08-07 08:29 am (UTC)Everything done here was fragile, easily broken by a simple disappearance, a return home.]
You'll have her back.
[No arguing at all, for all he cared they were cold hard facts of things. Wasn't wrong in the thought he usually grieved alone, already had been for so many other things and this- this was the last straw in a few months.
Tired of being alone.]
I've already cleared out her home, of what couldn't be left there. [Perishables, the animals. He'd done all the important things that day. Some days before.]
I forget, did I ever give you a taste of that liquor here that cuts through all of the SEP bullshit?
[He planned to drink tonight.]
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Date: 2019-08-07 01:33 pm (UTC)I didn't know that. I wasn't certain what to expect when I went looking for Shrike in Cairo.
[He shrugged though because that was there and not here. All he knew was that he would be making a go for Gabriel as well now that he knew the man was alive after nothing more than crazy theories and rumours.
He looked around as if he could tell which items were Ana's and which were Gabe's. He hadn't been in the house long enough to actually be able to do that, but Ana had always had a certain taste to her things.]
Should have called me earlier. I could have helped clear her place out with you. [That wasn't something someone grieving should have to face alone.
He tilted his head slightly at the idea of a liquor that overtook their massive metabolism as SEP survivors. He'd given up drinking because there was no point doing it for the taste these days.]
...no, I don't remember you saying anything about that. [A beat.] So... we're drinking tonight? You sure that's not dangerous?
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Date: 2019-08-07 01:50 pm (UTC)[He'd had other things to take care of, knows of the drastic change when it came to the council, but otherwise he was left in some odd sort of limbo of what was going to happen next.
There were more teacups in the cabinet- but other than that he hadn't quite finished. He'd only mostly cleared out food and the like. Made sure he'd collected all of the animals' things as well.]
Not finished with it yet. Still... it still has things from 'the other you' as you put it there, too. [So of course he hadn't called, and it was all still there for him to sort through, just included Ana's things now, too.
Gabriel just moved towards the fridge, some clear glass bottles with neon purple, blue, and green liquids inside of them definitely a new addition. Enough to split or knock himself out alone that much faster, pulling a neon purple one out.]
It's not dangerous, no. figured either haul off down to the basement or living room. Enough food in the fridge to help combat any hangover.
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Date: 2019-08-08 03:34 am (UTC)And the tendril of hope for that was bittersweet now that she was gone, now that he had lost the opportunity to talk with her, to actually do more than look around her place and be twitchy indoors. With Ana gone, she would be back to wherever she had come from.
It really meant that he and Gabriel were rather alone, wasn't it? Sure, there was McCree, but that young man had always been Reyes' pet project. Ana had truly been closest to the two of them, and it seemed like the opportunity to have a touch of that was now lost. He sighed heavily and leaned against the door frame tucking his visor in his pocket carefully.]
We should clean out her place then tomorrow. [He didn't really have anything to say about other him or the potential items. If they were nice, maybe he'd bother himself enough to take them. It wasn't like he owned anything but what he carried on him.
He noted the vibrant colours of the drinks, and he raised an eyebrow at them. Nothing that colour ever did anyone any favours he figured. All the same, he had been asked to stay and maybe a part of him would enjoy being numb from alcohol. Been a long time.]
That's not what I meant. [He slowly entered the kitchen to peer around and then found a part of the counter to lean on.] You and I have never been drunk together, and after our little... pollination adventure, you think we should?
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Date: 2019-08-08 08:10 pm (UTC)Something had mended over the years in this place, because hell if Gabriel hadn't fully understood why Ana had done what she'd done. It was more having to understand what he'd done, why he was doing what he was doing.
That there was only revenge left for him, and he would have it. He'd put an end to Overwatch's sad story, never to let it be repeated again. Kept himself where he needed to be in order to do it.]
... Yeah. I basically got her animals and food. Tea. Things like that. [There were a lot of wood working tolls and other items that belonged to Morrison there. Hammock. Few other things like that. Things easy to carry and transport if he ever had to pick up and run to some safehouse or out in the woods.
Gabriel kept that unlabeled bottle in hand.]
I think it doesn't matter. I don't go that way when drunk, especially not if I'm going to get extremely drunk real fast. [What he was planning on doing, too. This wasn't to enjoy anything. This as to numb everything.] I just don't want to be alone right now, Jack.
I'm tired of it, tired of a lot right now.
[There was McCree up in one of the attic rooms, yes, but... This was a different sort of alone. Close as the cowboy was, it wasn't what Ana was. Or even what Jack himself had been.
Besides, the gunslinger was still picking himself up.]
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Date: 2019-08-09 04:18 am (UTC)[It was that part which bothered him more than he would have expected it to. Gabriel wasn't the Reaper that he had heard rumours and reports about, and that was a big change. To lose Ana was to lose the possibility of having someone that had watched that change happen over the years. Also, who else had even been here as long as Reyes anymore?
He grunted at the mention of tea.] Always with her tea. She never had whiskey or anything fun. Swear she would pack my wounds with tea leaves one of these days. [He shook his head.] Never could sew flesh together either. Always left that for you.
[Yeah well, he supposed that was true, but there was a frown on his lips when Gabe made it clear this was going to be a night where black-out drunk was the objective of the evening and Reyes planned on getting to that finish line as fast as possible. It was only the request to stay from before that had him holding his tongue. Gabe was an adult and could do whatever the hell he wanted.]
You're tired of being alone? [Not sure he exactly expected to hear that so soon, even if he saw it, saw the signs.] I said I would stay, and I will, Gabriel. I can still be a man of my word.
[He slowly eased over to the fridge and opened it to pull out one of the neon blue bottles and swirled the liquid. He popped the cap off with a thumb and turned back to regard the older man.]
You're a sad sack of crap, you know that. Come one, let's find a place for you to drink yourself to oblivion and I'll try not to draw on your face when you're out.
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Date: 2019-08-09 06:04 am (UTC)Solider: 76 turning up had been something that meant he'd have to step in rather than be in and out. Why not take the opportunity to prove that he had been looking for the man since Switzerland? Knew that he'd survived, but never acted despite the fact it was expected of him to take the both of them out.
At least he knew someone who'd been here for five years.] Need something in you other than whiskey, probably good for you- on her end? You were back at her hideout in Cairo. She's going back to you.
[Give him that much to hold on to at least.
This wasn't some time to drink and enjoy it, there was nothing to enjoy. Just drink and feel nothing for at least a little while before picking himself right back up. Some moment of weakness.]
I'm the one that always ends up that way in the end. [Why the hell not allow for feeling sorry for himself? After holding it together for the last few months, just... letting go for a night.
Snorting but, well. He wasn't going to argue, grabbing a few more bottles from that fridge before heading for the sitting room. Den. Whatever, he was going to just sit on the couch.]
Talking like I need to let you get drunker before I do.
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Date: 2019-08-09 01:29 pm (UTC)He shrugged his shoulders, thinking he would still have been happier with whiskey. That bullet had done an excellent job trying to fester after all.] Probably, but it wasn't what I wanted after a fight with you. [He grunted as if her coming back to him meant some slight to Reyes. He doubted it was true.] Well, she sure as hell isn't joining Talon, so her hands were tied, weren't they? You weren't passing out invitations.
[It was nice to know they would have each other. Right now it seemed empty with how recently Ana had left. Maybe in time he'd unravel his complex feelings about that.
Jack looked at Gabriel and nodded his head, supposing that was true on some level.] I'm giving you twenty-four hours to feel sorry for yourself, so get it all out, alright? After that, I'm kicking your ass. [Because he and Reyes were about finding solutions, not griping about wallowing in problems. Still, everyone needed time to grieve.
And he could be the strong one. It hurt that Ana was gone, but he had less invested in this place, so he could just bury his feelings on that matter. Reyes needed it more now than ever, so he would actually do what he could to accommodate.
Instead, he followed Reyes to the sitting room, finding a part of the couch to settle himself into after a quick sweep with his eyes to make certain all was secure. The dogs would let them know if there were intruders in the area.]
Fat chance of that. You're the one hurrying to numb unconsciousness. I'm here to hold your hair when you puke in the toilet bowl.
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Date: 2019-08-09 02:05 pm (UTC)His concerns and attentions were elsewhere, stakes raised.
Made a low noise in his throat, more neutral than anything else he'd made lately.] Reasonable enough. Get it all out tonight. [Because he had to figure out a few things after.
Time management and just what the fuck was to be done with that base. Sitting back on that couch, already knowing all of the cats were going elsewhere if they hadn't already. Upstairs in to one of the second floor bedrooms, probably.
Lifted that bottle, top flicked off with his thumb—]
Just enjoy a damn bottle, and don't try and chug it. Shit will knock you off your feet.
[—Taking a good swig of that neon purple, sinking in to something of a slouch all the same.]
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Date: 2019-08-10 04:31 pm (UTC)They sometimes had done that, given one another time limits to bitch, moan, rage and rant. After the time limit came around, it was back to business and harsh realities where problems needed solution. Grief was always difficult to slot into limits, but Reyes' exhaustion for being alone was something he could. Let it all out.]
You're free to say and do whatever you want about it, and I'll be here listening. [And engaging. He didn't mind little scuffles that came with the need for a physical outlet as well, though honestly, alcohol tended to not be involved because they previously couldn't get drunk.
This would be an interesting test of old tactics.
He swirled the liquid in the bottle that he had, examining it.] I haven't been drunk since my twentieth birthday. [SEP had fixed that. He watched Reyes take a sip first then sipped from his own bottle. And then twitched. Shit that stuff was strong! He scrutinized the bottle again more closely.] What the hell is this stuff?
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Date: 2019-08-10 06:56 pm (UTC)Wasn't surprised when he saw so many familiar faces there, those from Overwatch as well.
It was better to have the time to work it out, get everything they could out all at once in anyway that was best. Hell, after they'd lost Ana before everything fell they'd both taken the time they could manage to mourn. Mourn before claws dug in to try and take everything apart, before they'd both had to focus and... pull apart.]
All you're going to hear is me feeling damn sorry for myself, Jack. [Something he'd kept buried for months, buried as deep as he could, but now there just... weren't so many projects to bury himself in. This one hit hard, one right after the other and it just.
He wanted to be numb, at least for a little while, before picking right back up. So he sunk in that couch and just drank slowly. Letting it be felt rather than downing the bottle quick.] Well, happy birthday again. This shit will do it.
Emotional bullshit liquor making, it's called a Gargleblaster and it's delicious.
[Sweet and fruity, thanks.]
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Date: 2019-08-10 08:53 pm (UTC)It was interesting how the first time Ana had died, he had spent years blaming himself. He thought that he would revert back to that in finding out that she had gone back this time, but honestly, he mostly just felt numb. He couldn't tell what that actually said about him, but he supposed that his hair couldn't go any more white these days, so no point sitting on the grief.
Mourning was something he didn't do much anymore. He liked to think he didn't care enough to, but that was wrong. Maybe he just hadn't stopped in the last six years.]
That's fair. You've suffered your share of losses over the years. Now what? You live the dangerous game of whatever you're doing in Talon. For the last few years, you've been stuck in a place that you'll never remember when you go back, so what's the actual point of investing, right? [He had no doubt that Gabriel could flesh out the assessment for hours on end. Maybe there would even be a story or two about the other him that had been here for years.
Best he could do was poke Reyes to open up the flood gates before the man hit the drawling barely conscious stage of waxing and waning depressive slurred poetry. It probably wouldn't even rhyme.]
No point. I stopped celebrating birthdays years ago. [No point celebrating when alone. He took another sip from his drink, holding it on his tongue a little longer than the first time.] Maybe if we get drunk enough, we can wake up thinking we're home.
[Of course it was emotional bullshit liquor. Why was he not surprised at all?]
Fruity drinks were never my favourite. [He wasn't about to refuse free booze that would knock his socks off.]
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Date: 2019-08-11 09:10 am (UTC)Yet here he damn well was. Nearly three years and- well. Not the only one here, but now the only one here from their world that had been in this place for so long. Why him of all people? What was the point of it all?
Reduce him to this goddamn mess?
Nearly scoffed—] My 60th only got celebrated because Shimada remembered while he was here and pulled Kevin in to help. I don't even remember the last time anyone, let alone me, bothered to before that.
[Why celebrate when you were dead to the world at large? Better off that way.
The fact he downed nearly half the bottle at that was likely not a goo sign. Grimacing more at the sudden burn of it all going down than anything else.] Why bother thinking we're home? You're somewhere in Cairo and I'm off in Venice months after that run in.
It's just as damn pointless as anything here.
[No really, he went over the pointlessness of everything mentally of a regular enough basis it's a surprise he was keeping it together as long as he had.]
They're my favorite.
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Date: 2019-08-11 11:21 pm (UTC)He looked over at Gabriel hunkered on the other side of the couch nursing on that fruity neon drink of his. He considered for a moment.] Didn't think either Shimada would care much for birthdays. Seemed too formal or morose most times I ever laid eyes on them.
[Exactly. No point celebrating when dead. Also no point celebrating when there was no one to celebrate with. It was just another day.
So much for taking his own advice and not chugging it, Gabe. He shook his head, but he made no correction. Reyes was an adult. He wasn't his boss anymore.] Months after, huh? Guess I never caught up with you in that time.
And yet you've set down roots here. Now you're suffering new losses.
[He sipped his drink, taking the moderation approach but mostly because he didn't actually believe he would be able to get wasted. It was strong, but his metabolism had never actually failed before. As he said, someone had to hold Gabe's hair out of his face if vomiting started... or the guy was reduced to muck on the floor that he had to usher into a bottle.]
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Date: 2019-08-12 03:35 pm (UTC)Reyes could only manage full meals for multiple people, but at least it was good. The hands returned with the containers and some forks. Grabbing up one as for the moment after that large drink he was going to be eating some cold- it looked like some sot of cheesy chicken pasta.]
Genji's lightened up a lot, that monk I mentioned before. He's a good kid, always had been even with all that hurt and anger in him. [Could fucking relate now.] He wanted me to celebrate my 60th, and so he and Kevin pulled together a Halloween themed birthday party for me. Actually invited other people who knew me here, too.
First time in years people wanted to celebrate the fact I exist. [Well, it was starting, but at least this time when he took a swig from his own bottle there'd be food with it.]
I don't even know when I did, kept telling myself it was pointless- but people kept... wanting me to have something.
[Jack was going to be in for a surprise, because the fact it cut through Gabriel's own metabolism on top of the wraith bullshit- well. He'd been feeling it a lot sooner than he expected.]
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Date: 2019-08-12 06:22 pm (UTC)He paused from taking another sip at the weird shadow hands, watching them move off with interesting control and then bringing back food. He shrugged his shoulders, aware that would only slow the process of getting absolutely wasted. Still, he hadn't seen food like that since the last time he had spied on a restaurant.]
Yeah, so you said. Still have trouble imagining it; he was such a quiet and damaged kid when you were picking him up. [He nodded his head, glad to here that Reyes had managed some semblance of connection to people who really seemed to care about him. It seemed like such a rare thing these days. for people like them.] Must have been quite the ride having people celebrate you. Good party too?
[76 thought it was pointless, but he could see the draw. He shrugged a little, not expecting the same.] Good to have something, even if you taught me having something just means it can be taken away.
[He was sipping it like it was just a casual drinking party, like he always had. It warmed his belly, but otherwise, he was okay for the time being.]
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Date: 2019-08-13 06:47 am (UTC)Gabriel tapped the lid of a box-] There's enough for you, if you don't want to drink on an empty stomach. Do you better in the long run. [-before returning to his bottle. If he was going to even near the possibility of hanging over a toilet, he at least wanted more than stomach acid to come up after a while. Terrible as that thought was.
He was a 'responsible' drink-to-numb-the-pain-er? Something.]
Was a good party, yeah. They'd gotten Ana's help, too.
[Good memories of that day, but it's all they were. Even then they only would last so long as he was in this place. Pointless again.] Sometimes you've also got to decide if having it is worth that risk. Taught you that, too.
[Was anything ever worth that risk?]
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Date: 2019-08-14 08:43 pm (UTC)[He looked at the box of left-overs for a long moment and shrugged his shoulders. When was the last time he ate anything not cooked over a fire? Lately, not much. Before, only in hovels where only a cast-iron stomach likely allowed him to survive the experience without puking for the next thirty-six hours.
Slowly, he reached out to take the box that Gabriel indicated and a utensil and set both in his lap. His drink went between his knees as he opened the box to peer at the contents.] You made it seem like there wouldn't be a long run here. [He took a taste first, but who was he to complain about free food that fed directly into not only his metabolism but was probably some of the first emotional-enriched food he had eaten that wasn't made by him.] It's good. You made it?
[He nodded his head and picked through the food in front of him, putting some on his stomach so he doesn't just get too wasted and be useless to Reyes in this. He's supposed to be the less sad one, which... he actually isn't. Losing Ana was devastating, but he won't process it for a time.]
Something you'll remember, no doubt. Guess we only really have memories at this point.
[76 snorted softly, shaking his head. He hadn't had anything 'worthwhile' in years, and he'd tried to stop himself from caring about it for awhile now.] Look how well it got us too, hmm?
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Date: 2019-08-15 08:54 pm (UTC)[As for the food? It looked like something with steak, sliced up and seared so very nicely. Even if cold it would still feel like it was warming the man up as he ate. There were vegetables in there as well. Some possibly roasted potatoes. Whatever it was it was delicious, give him that much.] I'm responsible, even if I plan on getting drunk enough to black out.
Better not done on an empty stomach. [Still, there was a nod to the question. He'd made it. His food was always comforting in the emotional side of things. Warmed someone up from the inside out in the most pleasant of ways.] Yeah, got in a lot of practice here.
[Hell, part of the reason he invited Jack over was to let him have the time. He didn't doubt it had been like a gut punch, but let him process it in his own time.]
And even then they're temporary for this place. Go right back like nothing ever happened.
[Yet here he was all the damn same. Taking another drink from the bottle with the neon purple mix-] I don't regret anything about what we did back then.
All the more reason I'm doing what I'm doing.
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Date: 2019-08-17 07:45 pm (UTC)[It had been awhile since he had regretted his life, but now didn't seem like it was worth a new try at it. If this alcohol was as good as Reyes indicated, he was going to need to be cautious. He was here because his presence was requested, not so he could just give into that gaping despair that they could so easily stand on the edge of.] At least you're taking up old hobbies, I guess.
[It wasn't like Reyes slept apparently. That was a lot of time to think of losses. No wonder Gabriel wanted to get black-out drunk and forget for a few hours. Blessed peace and quiet from the brain weasels.]
So does that mean you're supposed to enjoy it while you can, or just refuse to do anything because it doesn't matter anyway?
[He grunted and sipped from his bottle once he had finished chewing the food in his mouth. The fruitiness didn't exactly mix well with the savoury food, but he had no complaints about free stuff.]
No regrets, huh? That's a good thought, I guess. We did a lot back then. [A pause as he rubbed his thumb on the bottle absently.] Remember when we were arguing over that Prague strategy and Ana grabbed us both by the ears and dragged us around the whole room calling us stubborn idiots?
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